16 February 2011

Love Byte #16 "Opposites Attract" Guest Post By Heidi Of Me As A Mother

Hello everybody, Heidi here, visiting from Me As A Mother, and I am so happy to be a part of this wonderful series. Thank you lovely Priya, for letting me share today.

OK, so I'm just gonna lay this one out for you. I'm in love. Whole-heartedly. No turning back. In it for life. Stuck like glue.  But this person scares the shit out of me. A few adjectives to describe my love: intense, critical, perfectionist, overly-dramatic, know-it-all.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet my 5-year-old, Ava Rae.

This kiddo is my first born and the exact opposite of me in almost every way. There are some days when I look at my husband and say "I don't know how to parent her. I really don't." There are some nights when I go to bed and think "I failed her today." There are moments when I quantum leap into the future and see Ava at 15, arguing with me, fighting dirty. Where's the bourbon? Make it a double, please.

And yet. My love for her is so big that none of the aforementioned matters. These challenges are making me a better parent; to Ava and to her sisters. These challenges are making me a more empathetic person, helping me to realize that everybody responds to patience and kindness, regardless of their innate personality. These challenges are helping me to be kinder to myself.

But I am totally keeping a bottle of bourbon on hand.


  1. love this...I can totally relate. Great post, Heidi!

  2. Heidi, outstanding! You have managed to capture what every mother feels of at least ONE of her children. I don't know why it happens, but there is always one that is so much harder than the others. It makes the job of being a mother so much frustrating but after parenting two, who are now adults, I can tell you it also makes it that much more rewarding. Like you mention, it helps you figure things out, develops and matures your feelings of empathy and most of all, it allows you to come to terms with the fact that being a parent entails "on the job training." Most of us don't know what the hell we're doing. We just do and hope. Hope that what we do is right and that in the end, it won't be "this" kid who'll be the one to put us in the nursing home! :) Beautifully delivered, my sister! Now pass the bourbon!

  3. Liked this post very much! If only kids came with instructions!!

  4. Parenting! .. a love which I will know of quite later from now.. but its always good education reading about mum's and their kiddos. Priya, once again, thanks for inviting such lovely minds to write such enriching nurturing thoughts.

  5. I agree with bella this is outstanding, so honest and loving. She's probably more like you than you think, which will make the fighting more difficult to navigate when she gets older. Keep the cabinets stocked and locked. And how great is a mother's love.

  6. Thank you so much for your comments friends!

  7. Interesting how kids can be so different than the parents but so same at the same time. I have two sons, one is opposite of me and one is exactly the same.

  8. Ahh the jobs of parenting I will have in the future :)


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